How can I support someone dealing with Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria?

# Supporting Someone with Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria (RSD) can be tough to understand, but your support can be a lifeline. Here’s what you need to know to help someone you care about while ensuring you also take care of your own mental health. ## What Supporters Should Know - **What RSD Is**: RSD is characterized by extreme emotional responses to perceived rejection or criticism. It's common in individuals with ADHD but can affect anyone. Understanding that these feelings are real and often overwhelming for your friend or loved one is key. - **It’s Not Just About Being Sensitive**: The emotional pain stemming from RSD can feel debilitating. It’s not just about feeling sad; it can lead to anxiety, anger, or withdrawal. Acknowledging this can help you provide more empathetic support. - **It’s Personal**: Each person experiences RSD differently. Some may react more intensely than others, and triggers can vary widely. ## Helpful vs Unhelpful Responses ### Helpful Responses - **Validate Their Feelings**: Use phrases like “That sounds really tough” or “I can’t imagine how painful that must feel.” Validation can help them feel seen and heard. - **Listen Without Judgment**: Sometimes, just being there to listen can be the best support. Avoid jumping in with solutions unless they ask for advice. - **Encourage Professional Help**: If they seem open to it, gently suggest talking to a mental health professional who can provide strategies and coping mechanisms. ### Unhelpful Responses - **Minimizing Their Experience**: Phrases like “It’s not that big of a deal” or “Just get over it” can feel dismissive and hurtful. - **Offering Clichés**: Responses such as “You’ll be fine” or “Don’t worry about what others think” may come off as unhelpful. They might need more than just reassurance. - **Comparing Struggles**: Avoid saying things like “I’ve been rejected too!” Everyone’s experience is unique, and comparison can invalidate their feelings. ## Communication Tips - **Use “I” Statements**: Instead of saying “You always overreact,” try “I feel concerned when I see you upset.” This approach is less accusatory and more supportive. - **Check-In Regularly**: A simple message asking how they’re feeling can mean a lot. It shows you care and are thinking of them. - **Be Patient**: Sometimes, they may need space or time to process. Respect their boundaries while letting them know you’re there when they’re ready. ## Self-Care for Supporters - **Set Boundaries**: It’s okay to take breaks. Supporting someone can be emotionally draining, so make sure you’re also tending to your own emotional needs. - **Seek Your Own Support**: Talk to friends, family, or a therapist about your feelings. It’s important to have your own support system. - **Engage in Self-Care Activities**: Spend time doing things you enjoy, whether it's reading, exercising, or hanging out with friends. Taking care of yourself allows you to be a better support for others. ### Remember It’s okay to not have all the answers. Just being there for someone can sometimes be more powerful than the words you say. If your loved one is experiencing thoughts of self-harm or is in crisis, please encourage them to reach out to a professional or contact the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 988 for immediate support. Being supportive is a journey, not a destination. You’re doing great just by being there.